NIT WIT NEWZ December 2022
NIT WIT NEWZ
(Nit Wit Newz is an unauthorized, often unreliable, on-line news source designed to keep Manor residents abreast of the inconsequential, trifling, and superficial events that dramatically shape and inform our everyday lives at Rogue Valley Manor).
NEWZ TAKES ON BURNING ISSUE
Each week dozens of letters from our readers flood into our offices here in the Nit Wit Newz Tower on the RVM campus. Many seeking help in all manner of personal affairs; many concerning life here at RVM. From time to time, we find a letter that might be of interest to all of our RVM readers. Here is one:
Dear Nit Wit Newz,
The Christmas holidays are now upon us and I would like to salute those responsible for the lovely decorations in the Manor lobby. The conifer tree, the decorative wreaths, the white poinsettia plants, the “ginger bread” castle displays, and, of course, the out-sized St. Nicholas figure, all contribute to make our holidays bright.
There is, however, one unsettling false note in this otherwise joyful setting. While the rest of the world is “roasting chestnuts on an open fire,” we here at Rogue Valley Manor must settle, in our Manor fireplace, for a couple of dozen flaming marbles that change colors every once in a while.
Chestnut-roasting may have seen its day, but those same “open fires” elsewhere are now graced with burning logs or, more practically these days, realistic ceramic logs warmed by a natural gas fire.
In the past several Christmas seasons, since our new Manor fireplace was installed, I have yet to see a resident, or guest, warming their backsides against those glowing marbles. Most of us, I would guess, try our best to avoid looking foolish.
Perhaps I’m overly nostalgic, but to me, there’s something comforting, even pleasingly hypnotic, about sitting in front of a fireplace and staring into a set of flame-licking logs. I feel certain that others here at RVM share that same feeling. Oddly, not only does our two-sided, island fireplace lack logs of any kind, it also is absent seating.
Since our fireplace is fitted for gas, it would seem to be a simple conversion to add a grate and toss a few ceramic logs on our fireplace during the winter season. And, while we’re at it, let’s place some seating in front of that cozy fire.
Since Nit Wit Newz holds enviable sway among the influential and powerful here at RVM, may we enlist your aid in helping to effect a change in the Manor fireplace area?
Thank you,
Holly Day
(The NIT WIT NEWZ response)
Dear Ms. Day,
We here at Nit Wit Newz also suspect that many of our residents share your views on the Manor fireplace. It is unlikely that our current lobby fireplace jingles anyone’s holiday bells.
Yule logs, yes; yule marbles? Not so much.
So, yes, Nit Wit Newz willingly rises to the challenge of re-configuring that flame-burning marble unit to a more traditional fireplace, at least for the winter season.
Our plan is to gather data-driven facts so that we can present an impenetrable case to the proper Manor authorities.
Towards that end, we are asking readers of The Complement to register their opinion on the subject.
It’s simple: Immediately below this text you are reading, there are the words “Leave a Reply.” We urge you to register your opinion on Ms. Day’s fireplace issue; merely type in your preference “Yes” or “No.”
A “Yes” vote =”Let’s lose our marbles.”
A “No” vote = Call me a Marblehead, but let those darling, inanimate orbs continue to languish on the fireplace floor all year long.
Note: The “ballot” below requires you to leave your name. Be assured your name will NEVER be otherwise used or circulated by “The Complement” or by Nit Wit Newz. Its inclusion merely allows us to discourage duplicate votes by the same overly enthusiastic voting person. Thank you for your participation in our survey.
Survey results?
Watch this space.
—A. Looney
We don’t need to get rid of the “marble fireplace” but I do think that there should be some comfy chairs in front of it. Surely we could rearrange the chairs. It’s not the Titanic!
Let’s think carefully about this. Arden has a beautiful fake wood fireplace. Drew G. told me at the Gala that they can’t turn it on as it does too good a job of heating the room. We need to be careful what we ask for — we might get it. For now I’m content to watch the flames flicker over the marbles.
I would prefer warmer colors in the marble display. I’ve heard from one resident, who sat in front of the fireplace one afternoon, that it was the warmest place in the foyer. It’s the carpet that bothers me and the laminated flooring at the coffee/tea center.
There are more important issues in this world but I love reading The NIT WHIT
I would prefer warmer colors in the marble display. I’ve heard from one resident, who sat in front of the fireplace one afternoon, that it was the warmest place in the foyer. It’s the carpet that concerns me and the laminated flooring at the coffee/tea area.
I love reading The NIT WIT NEWZ.
Happy Holidays! 🎄🎼🤗 🐱 🐱
I also have found the Manor lobby fireplace to be artificial looking, although this seems to be the current style based on what I have seen elsewhere. I doubt any changes are imminent, but if you want a cozy fireplace, there is a nice one in the RVM library behind the new book display. Seating is included!
Yes
Our new fireplace is the “latest” type around. It’s attractive, but is not the comforting type we’re used to having. We don’t want additional money spent to change it, however, as we feel things are “tight” for all right now.
I would like to see seating of some kind in front of our fireplace.